Decisions. Decisions. Decisions.

Notes:

  • The word decision will be used a million times.
  • I apologise in advance if this triggers an existential crisis.
  • This is a low-key existential crisis.

I know I speak on behalf of many people here when I say I can’t make decisions about my future. I don’t like the idea of choosing an option that can, as the expression goes, “close a door”.

I can’t decide what to do about anything because I literally don’t know what I want my future to look like. Do I want an office job? Do I want to pursue a career in photography? Do I want to carry on with education after my degree and possibly do a masters? Or the question I’m sure 99% of uni students will ask themselves on a daily basis “do I even want this degree anymore?”

I’ve always been an indecisive person, but when it comes to thinking about a career and the future I can’t decide. I’ll spend at least 30 minutes looking at a restaurant menu because I can’t decide what I want, while my friends dagger me to hurry up. I’ll even spend ages getting ready just deciding which foundation to use let alone deciding on the future.

Deciding what to do is literally going to impact the rest of my life and it’s the scariest thing. Why can’t life be like the sims? What if I decide I want a business career now but next year I then decide I want to try out being a secret agent? And what after that I want to be a writer? Then decide no, actually, a culinary career is where it’s at. How has anyone ever decided what they want to do? It’s absolute stress!

I feel like I’m just starting to realize what people mean when they say life is too short. I don’t want to make a decision about my future because I don’t know which decision is right for my future. I don’t want to waste time but I realize I’m also wasting time by not D-E-C-I-D-I-N-G.

School lied when they said you’ll know what you want to do when you go to uni. I want a refund please!

I just literally don’t know at this point. Am I overthinking it? I  think most people would have got it together by now. Or is that just how everyone wants it to look, but secretly they’re just winging it?

I haven’t got a clue. What a mess!

As always, thanks for reading!

Xo’s, Kitty Girl

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